Hey Queens, I was scrolling through old notes on my phone and ran across this gem that I wrote my sophomore year of college. I was in the thick of interview season and noticed my head began to get a little too big and needed a quick heart check amongst all of the interview offers. The beauty and irony of this story is that I actually got rejected from every single position. In fact, I didn’t receive my internship offer until a week after the internship God had for me actually started. Ladies, you’ve heard the story before — but it was actually a job that I didn’t even interview for. Truly God’s grace. Sometimes the Lord has to humble you and knock you to your knees for you to be in the proper position to receive. There’s a word in there — some of you didn’t catch it. It’s okay, it wasn’t until I was on my knees that I had this revelation so I pray that as you read this, you have a leg buckling, drop you to your knees in worship revelation as well.
I’ve noticed that we often use God for our benefit. Praying to God and asking Him to point us in the direction of jobs, careers, choices that we never included Him in – in the first place. We need to shift the “what can God do for me” mentality into “what can God do through me.” Or better yet, “where can I follow God in this season.” When I say, “we,” I must admit that I am probably the most guilty of them all. Less than an hour ago, the Holy Spirit convicted me as I was on my knees, asking God to tell me which job He’d prefer I take. EY or Bank of America? Wall Street or Big 4? Then I realized that the Lord simply wasn’t going to tell me because He wants me to understand that my life is not my own, and trust the process. The Lord is living in me, through me, and I have the opportunity to live with Him. So, my job is to say “yes” and enjoy the ride. Having all the answers means that I don’t have to trust. I can rely on my own knowledge — pride. If I knew what job I may have after college, then I wouldn’t have to trust Him through the rejected applications, the no’s, the yay’s the judgment from peers, the naysayers or opinions of others. How am I to be faithful over living in today if I am focused on living in 2 years from now? I am forced to simply rely on and feed off of His Word, and His Word alone — true daily bread. It wasn’t me who secured these interviews, it was the Lord. So how dare I go into each or any interview thinking that it is me who will secure the offer? I find rest in knowing that the Lord orders my steps and has called me to a very specific position. A rejection is simply a “not that one,” from the Lord, and each offer may not be the offer from the Lord. Resting in the Lord is my best option. The only option.
Thank you Lord, for your mercy and kindness. You are too good to us — I pray that you will remind us of your glory in the moments that we become prideful and forgetful. I love you